The Curse of Snu-Snu
A millennia ago there was a highly skilled monk that travelled the lands. While his name has been lost to the ages, he was commonly called Snu-Snu. An extreme celibate, Snu-Snu was disgusted by any form of sexual arousal outside of intentional procreation, and that even that was to not result in any pleasure to be had. He also claimed that his martial powers came from his celibacy, and that not even the Gods could tempt him.
Well, the Gods are a fickle and egotistical bunch. A majority of them got together to decide how to punish Snu-Snu for this effrontery. The debate quickly turned into a shoving match, and tempers flared until Sinela, Goddess of Humor, Lust and Chaos, offered a punishment idea that turned the fisticuffs into roars of laughter. The punishment was the most dramatically ironic punishment that had ever been inflicted upon a mortal before or since.
Soon thereafter, Snu-Snu entered a martial tournament that was known throughout the realms as one that would prove who the greatest martial artist around was. Snu-Snu won his first two combats quickly, pummeling his opponents into unconsciousness with a few powerful hits. His third combat was rather different, however. When his first punch landed, his opponent moaned and became obviously turgid under his robe. As punches contacted, Snu-Snu's foe moaned louder and louder and quickly became distracted. One last blow from the now furious monk caused his opponent to orgasm loudly and messily, falling unconscious and spent to the floor.
The laughter of the crowd caused Snu-Snu to become quite red. How could his enemy be so disgusting, to receive sexual pleasure from the pain that was being inflicted? He demanded a new opponent, and one was supplied for him. A woman this time, the exact same thing happened yet once again except that a fairly large puddle of vaginal lubricant and piss was left on the floor as well. This was beyond vile! How could such a thing happen? Disgusting! And why are they all laughing? The entire crowd is filled with perverts!
It soon became known that Snu-Snu could do nothing but inflict loathsome and nauseating sexual pleasure upon any living creature that he fought against, much to his ongoing chagrin. No matter where he went his reputation travelled with him, and while Snu-Snu was largely forgotten his name eventually became a term for the sex act. The term "Death by Snu-Snu" was coined by an all female barbarian tribe due to their preferred method of executing males.
Sinela, however, never forgot.
The Curse
Once in a generation, as a jest, Sinela bestows the Curse of Snu-Snu upon a monk.
Effects:
The afflicted monk cannot deal lethal damage with unarmed strikes
All damage dealt becomes nonlethal damage
Each successful strike induces involuntary waves of overwhelming physical pleasure in the target, disrupting their ability to act normally
For every 10 points of damage dealt, the target suffers a –1 penalty on attack rolls as their control steadily erodes
When a target is reduced to half hit points or lower, they experience a sudden, uncontrollable climax, leaving them Staggered for 1d4 rounds
If a strike deals damage equal to the target’s remaining hit points, the target is overwhelmed by a violent surge of sensation, becoming Stunned for 1 round
If nonlethal damage exceeds the target’s hit points, the target undergoes a complete physiological overload, collapsing Unconscious
This effect applies to any creature capable of such biological response
(Undead, constructs, and similar creatures are immune)
Removing the Curse
The Curse of Snu-Snu is notoriously difficult to remove:
- Remove Curse cast by a 20th-level caster or higher
- Wish or Alter Reality
On exceedingly rare occasions, Sinela herself may lift the curse, though this has only been recorded twice in the last thousand years.
Special:
The Curse of Snu-Snu is treated as a Flaw (per Unearthed Arcana), but does not grant a bonus feat.
